Prune.
Cut away.
Kill it.
Knock it off. Stop that.
When we begin with the end in mind (our death), these sorts of thoughts will inevitably arise. I think they should. Because we all have character qualities, habits, and ways of living that, if we knew we were to die tomorrow, we would prune out of our lives immediately. Wouldn’t give it a second thought.
Yesterday my kids kept asking me to play with them. I was busy, and enjoying my busyness of taking down Christmas decorations and cleaning up. I know it’s weird but I get an enjoyment with these sorts of things sometimes. And I thought about the story that I was writing in that moment of saying no to them and the story and legacy I would leave as potentially the dad who said “no.” I course corrected and enjoyed playing a round of battleship with my littles.
Now, I know that may not be true of me always, and that one instance of saying “no” to my kids may not be something that would stick with them forever as an impression of who I was. But over time it certainly could.
I want to live well and the reality of my death is a springboard to a life well-lived.
I have been reading Henry Cloud’s book, Necessary Endings. In it he writes about how in order for us personally or our businesses to grow, sometimes certain things need to end. Fruit trees and grapevines need pruned and cut back for more fruit to grow. He said,
“When pruning is not happening, average or worse will occur.”
This is a good time of year for you to audit your life. To look out along the vine of your life and see what is overgrown, dying, and producing much good fruit. What needs cut back? What needs to end? What needs to stay in 2022? You know you can leave it there, right? Imagine if you did! How would the chapter of 2023 read?
The truth is, death is coming. It is unavoidable. Why not use that reality to your advantage this year? Use your death to show you what needs put to an end. Death has a way of doing that - shining a light on what needs to go. Why go to the grave gripping that vice? What story do you want to be leave behind?
“The fool tries to adjust the truth so he does not have to adjust to it.” -Henry Cloud, Necessary Endings
Here’s to adjusting to leveraging the truth of our end.
Cheers!